Ask Wendy

Do I Give the New Guy a Gift?

Reprinted from December 23, 2016
Hey Wendy,

I am having a third date with a new guy I like a lot on Christmas day, we’re going to a party. It turns out his birthday is on Christmas.

I’m not sure whether to give him a gift, two gifts or no gifts because we’re so new.

If I give him a gift, will come off like I'm trying too hard?

Kathy H. - Burbank, CA

Hey Kathy,

The odds are good that since I went on 121 first dates and there are only 365 days in a year that this exact experience could happen to me. And it did! I’ve got this! When I went on date number three with Christmas baby, First Date #5, I had the same concerns you’re having.

I ended up buying him two books. I wrapped one in birthday paper and the other in Christmas paper, and when I presented them to him, I said that I knew we were new, but if we ended up dating for any length of time I would feel like a schmuck if I hadn’t gotten him anything for his birthday or for Christmas.

He appreciated the gifts and, most importantly, the wrapping in two different kinds of paper. Most people born on or near Christmas prefer that we celebrate the two separately and not collapse the festivities. Celebrate each in a small way and you’ll be golden.

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